You know what I've always wanted? A silent butler. No, not that kind of butler but rather a handy sterling or silver plated contraption used to quietly and efficiently (and stylishly too) whisk away crumbs from a table or ashes from an ashtray. Do I need one, you ask? No. No one I know smokes, and my guests tend to be pretty tidy eaters. I think I like it for novelty's sake.
I've been eyeing this Tiffany Bamboo silent butler for years!
A more traditional Chippendale style piece
The other silver piece I'd like is a canapes server that looks similar to a silent butler. It's a lidded compartment with a smallish sized handle. (Any ideas as to what it's called?) There is this fabulous scene from an obscure Joan Crawford movie titled "Harriet Craig" (it's about a woman who is compulsive, possessive, a liar, and a bit of a sociopath, yet, she keeps the tidiest home you've ever seen. She goes nuts when things are out of place. Oh, and her prized possession is an Oriental vase) in which she serves her beleaguered husband canapes in something like it. Well, that scene did it for me. I want to serve canapes that way too.
So, channeling my inner Harriet Craig (that's Joan as Harriet, above, next to her prized vase), if I were to pass hors d'oeuvres from said silver dish, I'd probably serve something retro like this:
Season cream cheese very highly, using grated, fresh horse-radish root for the predominating flavor. Shape into inch-long croquette forms and roll in finely chopped, well-grilled bacon. Skewer and serve before the bacon softens.
Then again...maybe I wouldn't!
(Image at top: Italian silent butler c. 1935-40)